February 2012
6 posts
Feb 11th
2 notes
this isn't twitter: It's that time of week where... →
As a fan of Christi and wrestling, this gets an automatic repost. christiolson: Every Monday at 8 o’clock, my otherwise wonderful boyfriend participates in a WWE live blog with our friends Joel and Yates. I didn’t understand wrestling back in the 90s when my sister watched it, and I sure as hell don’t understand it now. It’s not that I haven’t tried! When we all…
Feb 7th
3 notes
Feb 6th
6 notes
Food And Me Eating It
Today, I attended a vegan bake off. Vegan bake offs (as well as Raw Food Fuck n’ Suck Battles To The Death) aren’t really my thing. Not because I have any ill will towards vegans (I don’t), but because that kind of get-together just exposes how fucked up my palate is. I eat a diet of candy, malt liquor, meat products and things made out of 58% salt. At a vegan bake off,...
Feb 4th
2 notes
Feb 3rd
Two People That Fucking Get It, Man
Drew Magary is a hero of mine for a variety of reasons.  This piece in his most recent mailbag, sent me into a full on powerswoon. Take it away, copy n’ paste. William: I am convinced the pretzel people have some dirt on the party mix people. How are pretzels still in party mix? They suck and are always the last thing finished. I usually end up throwing away a bag of pretzels once...
Feb 2nd
1 note
January 2012
7 posts
SNEAK PEEK AT THE NEW DELOCATED OPENING SEQUENCE
I’ve never french kissed God, but I bet it’s still not as good an experience as watching new Delocated episodes. delocatedblog: Go here to enjoy some ridiculousness: http://youtu.be/4pu-ZEinTBw
Jan 21st
118 notes
Slurpee Talk
On social media (the wave of the future today!), I made a pissy comment about my displeasure with the quality of 7-Eleven’s Slurpees in Toronto. To be specific, I said: Dan MacRae@danmacrae Hi @7ElevenCanada Is there a reason why all Slurpees in the GTA taste like polio? Is this a regional thing or just several bad locations? 2:18 PM - 8 Jan 12 via web · Embed this...
Jan 9th
6 notes
Jan 9th
4 notes
Jan 7th
1 note
WatchWatch
Nikki Payne - 2:42 I have now seen this and my life is so much richer for it.
Jan 7th
5 notes
An Excerpt From My Upcoming Bestseller "Xlybok:...
Chapter 17 The More The Cybergame Changes, The More It Stays The Cybersame As they walked through the streets of Super Detroit, President Johnny Xlybok could sense that his Secret Service Agent was feeling uneasy. “What’s wrong Baptiste? Don’t you trust your President?” “It’s not you I don’t trust, sir. It’s this crazy mixed up world I...
Jan 2nd
2 notes
Jan 2nd
1 note
December 2011
15 posts
Guided By Gordon: A Ramble About My History Of...
Hello City. I’m going to be continuing my self-indulgent ramble about my unimpressive (and surprisingly light on ska) history of musical taste. It’s going to be an avalanche of text and Primitive Radio Gods inspired dick jokes, so there’s no shame in passing this by to look at new and exciting developments in the world of streaming pornography. That said, I recommend all my internet pals (Tumblr...
Dec 31st
4 notes
From Kiss to Kanye: Stop Being a Dick and Listen... →
Lovable comic/writer/bon vivant Dan Yates has revealed his musical history secrets and it makes for some excellent reading. There’s talk of influential cousins, Columbia House and the corrupting influence of pro wrestling. Point your computer surfboard in that direction, post-haste.
Dec 30th
1 note
9 Animals I Hope To See In The Wild Someday
1. Vanillaphant 2. Anti Gravity Turtle 3. Bear With A Lynx For A Tail 4. Kim Jong-il Reincarnated As A Swan Of High Esteem 5. Non Racist Marsupial 6. Tasmanian Accountant 7. Permed Eagle 8. Canary Sinise 9. Sour Cream n’ Onion Snail
Dec 30th
3 notes
A Christmas Tale
The Story Of The Puppy And Kitten That Saved Christmas Kitten: Let’s save Christmas! Puppy: Okay! Kitten: All done saving Christmas? Puppy: Yes indeed! Thanks for letting me team up with you to save Christmas. Kitten: My pleasure. (“Jump Jive & Wail” by The Brian Setzer Orchestra plays while the kitten and puppy dance and tell stories about their favourite ways to...
Dec 25th
2 notes
Dec 23rd
Dec 19th
The It’s Dan MacRae Top 50 Tracks Of 2011
I look forward to panicking and remembering all the things I forgot to put on this list. I’ll probably be holding a priceless vase or baby when it happens. Boy, I’ll look foolish. Well, that’s the price you pay for knocking out silly lists on Tumblr. Onward to the Top 50 Tracks Of 2011 (Earth Calendar). 50. Graham Wright - Potassium Blast 49. The Chemical Brothers -...
Dec 16th
4 notes
Dec 13th
57 notes
Guided By Gordon: A Ramble About My History Of...
Hello City. I’m going to be continuing my self-indulgent ramble about my unimpressive (and surprisingly light on ska) history of musical taste. It’s going to be an avalanche of text and Primitive Radio Gods inspired dick jokes, so there’s no shame in passing this by to look at new and exciting developments in the world of streaming pornography. That said, I recommend all my internet pals (Tumblr...
Dec 12th
2 notes
Guided By Gordon: A Ramble About My History Of...
Hello City. I’m going to be continuing my self-indulgent ramble about my unimpressive (and surprisingly light on ska) history of musical taste. It’s going to be an avalanche of text and Primitive Radio Gods inspired dick jokes, so there’s no shame in passing this by to look at new and exciting developments in the world of streaming pornography. That said, I recommend all my internet pals (Tumblr...
Dec 10th
6 notes
ListenDonny Hathaway - This Christmas The undisputed...
Dec 9th
2 notes
Royalty I'm Willing To Take Shit From
1. Intergalactic Baronesses 2. Puppy Dukes & Duchesses 3. Sultan Of Skittles 4. King Elizabeth II 5. A Pinball Machine With A Crown On It
Dec 7th
6 notes
Dec 7th
Dec 6th
Dec 6th
1 note
November 2011
20 posts
Guided By Gordon: A Ramble About My History Of...
Hello City. I’m going to be going on for a bit of a self-indulgent ramble about my history of musical taste. It’s going to be an avalanche of text and Primitive Radio Gods inspired dick jokes, so there’s no shame in passing this by to look at new and exciting developments in the world of streaming pornography. That said, I recommend all my internet pals (Tumblr enthusiasts and...
Nov 29th
4 notes
Nov 27th
Nov 27th
Ranking Santa Claus's Reindeer By Attractiveness
9. Blitzen 8. Dancer 7. Rudolph 6. Donner 5. Comet 4. Prancer 3. Cupid 2. Dasher 1. Vixen (Obviously number one because she has a big ass.)
Nov 27th
Nov 27th
Nov 26th
11 Magazines I Would Love To Subscribe To (Aside...
1. Imagined Candy Bar Fiesta Illustrated 2. Plot Recaps Of Boy Meets World As Explained By Dogs With Speech Balloons 3. Scratch n’ Sniff Maclean’s 4. Hustler (For Men) 5. Tiger Beat Magazine (Not the popular teenybopper magazine, but a magazine for people that would like to train tigers to beat up their enemies. By having tigers not use their claws or biting techniques in their...
Nov 26th
Nov 26th
2 notes
Nov 26th
1 note
An Incredibly Broad Recap Of Survivor Series 2011
Match 1: Blonde Confidence (accompanied by Screaming Widow) vs. Parkour Pal America Belt Contest Winner: Blonde Confidence (retains belt powers) Post Match Note: Long Island Tan Man attacked Blonde Confidence After The Match Match 2: Strong Lady vs. Generic Lady Sparkle Belt Contest with other ladies of various distinctiveness positioned around the wrestlesquare. Winner: Strong Lady ...
Nov 21st
Let's Make Cuba Gooding Jr. Into Cuba Greating Jr.
I’m a big fan of Cuba Gooding Jr. I think it might be because we have a lot in common. We both like hockey, we both have been mistakenly thought to be homosexual while at sea (in his case it was a movie) and we both like the early filmography of Cuba Gooding Jr. As a fan, I want to see Cuba pulled from direct to DVD purgatory and back into the world of major motion pictures. I’m not...
Nov 19th
3 notes
Nov 18th
Got My Dolly Parton On
(I wrote this as part of my Aw NFL Naw column, but I figured I’d post it here as well. I’m feeling all multiposty and junk.) Today I went to a job interview that was one of those “parade of red flags” type job interviews. I’m desperate for a job (Did you know McDonalds only accepts online applications? I didn’t.), so I’ve been applying for a whole slate of questionable positions....
Nov 11th
1 note
Fur Of Legal Fury
Here are the ten animals I would give power of attorney to. 1. Bear 2. A Duck Named Andrew 3. Conjoined Buffalo 4. Mouseketeer 5. Timberwolf (only wolves of the timber variety) 6. Snakes Covered In Rhinestones 7. Hilary Clinton In An Otter’s Body 8. Manticore 9. CyberHorse 10. Tooth Fairy
Nov 5th
Links 386
I’ve some things that exist in the world of existing. Including a whole assortment of silly business (but not monkey business) over at Bite. Bite’s NHL Fun Fact Roundup For Fun Fact Enthusiasts And Roundup Enjoyingers Top 9 Overlooked Canadian Crushes Also, I interviewed a dog for the Prairie Dog. I may also have released a single called “Straight Up”, but that was...
Nov 5th
I Also Watched Parks & Rec Today
Ontario, please get better milk packaging. The cartons and bags you use would be more appropriate for storing nightmares.
Nov 5th
1 note
Adjusting To The New Surroundings
One of my current goals is to conquer my issues with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Typing, deleting and retyping that sentence 64 times indicates that doing so may prove to be a trickier proposition than I originally thought.
Nov 4th
creelmankid asked: Wait. You moved to Toronto?
Nov 3rd
On Wednesday I Learned About Black History
It’s Day 2 in Toronto and while I haven’t solved the aforementioned CN Tower mystery, I did get a photocopy-based magazine on black history. I also listened to DMX on my headphones while shopping for a blanket. As soon as I realized that “What’s My Name” was soundtracking my discount blanket search, the iPod’s Shuffle Songs mode tried to cover things up with the...
Nov 3rd
2 notes
The New Place
My first day in Toronto has ended and it is with a heavy heart that I must report that I have not yet solved the mystery of the CN Tower. My apologies to the Queen for the delay and I hope to give her and the entire Commonwealth the complete story on how the Aztecs built it.
Nov 2nd
1 note
October 2011
3 posts
Oct 29th
160 notes
Oct 2nd